Hello, and welcome back to”Empower The Vision In You” coaching series of blogs. This is coaching tip #6 and each one builds upon the one before it.
In the last coaching article, I wrote about how you have to make a decision. There is no turning back once you have made a decision to achieve a goal. You have decided to be persistent and willing to pay the price to accomplish it.
Today, I would like to speak about coaching tip #6, negative self talk which is one of three common reasons why many never achieve their dreams and goals like successful people do. Listen to this next statement as it is key: Once you commit yourself to moving out of the comfort zone and take a risk, that is when the negative self talk starts. You have felt more at ease where you are now than where you want to go. So, the mind wants to keep you there so that it stays comfortable. Your mind starts to begin to question all the reasons as to why it would be better for you to stay where you are. It wants you to stay where you have always been.
In the last post I spoke about the very first time I wrote a goal plan. It was for inventing the board game. I was going to do something that was foreign and “out of the box” for myself. I pushed through it and achieved the goal but not with some resistance from my mind. The negative talk in my head started, “Who am I kidding? Why do I think that I would be able to invent a board game? What do I know about inventing board games? I have to be really smart to invent a board game. I don’t know a publisher. I don’t even know what it is going to be about. My friends will laugh at me. My colleagues will look at me like I am a crazy lady. Maybe I can’t do it. Maybe it was just using “wishful thinking”.
Usually, when the negative self talk starts, a person literally talks themselves out of going for the goal and ends up staying where it is familiar and secure. I did not. I went for it. I pushed through it. I made the decision and there was no stopping me. I wasn’t giving up. You will do the same.
When you experience negative self talk, it can bring you down and paralyze you from taking action. It is the mind’s way of keeping you where you are where it is safe and comfortable. Here is an exercise to begin to change that around. When you hear a negative statement in your head, take that statement and immediately turn it around.
For example, let’s say you need to lose weight and have tried so many times before with no success. If your negative self talk repeats, “Who am I kidding, I can’t lose 20 lbs. I have tried too many times.”
Immediately turn it around in your head and say, “I am so happy and grateful now that I am excited and determined to lost 20 lbs. I know I can do it.”
That way, you turn negative self talk to positive self talk along with changing your emotional feelings to a positive vibration. Every time you become aware of negative self talk, change the statement into a positive one. This will take some time and even the best of us continue to battle negativity but they are much farther and fewer in between. The key is to become aware of the “mental chatter” and cut it off at the start.
Our mind thinks in pictures so when the negative self talk comes, you can also create an image of the new svelte you in a hot red dress that is at least two sizes smaller.
Be on the lookout for coaching tip #7 of Empower the Vision In You.